why am i not asleep yet

What do you call someone who knows a lot about herbs?

A sage.

in poor taste, of course

I'm back from HSNCT, that was fun. Here's one I came up with on the airplane.

What was Anne Frank's favorite literary dialect?

Attic Greek.

i dreid to be grosch in my operation

What did critics of avant-garde Weimar Berlin music think of the Threepenny Opera?

They re-Weilled it.

gotta hook you in like

Why did the obnoxious singer repeat the same chorus over and over again?

He couldn't refrain from doing so.

jews only for this one

What do Biblical commentators call it when one is struck with so great an awe for God that he turns around and runs?

A reversing wow.

also applicable to tombstone carvers

What happened when the typesetter lost his box of diacritics?

It was a grave situation.

OBSERVATION

"Hova?" in Hungarian means "Where to?". So if Jay-Z ever went to Hungary, he could get in a taxi and even the cab drivers would be calling him by his name.

VAGUELY RELATED PUN

How does a canine cartoon character map out his plans despite not having opposable thumbs with which to hold a pen?

Using Blue prints.